Monday, June 29, 2009

In This Hour….

As I reflect on Michael Jackson’s death, I’ve noticed a few things. First there are two sides to MJ; a professional side and a personal side. There are plenty of people who prefer to dwell on the negative personal aspects of his life. As I see it, we can focus on MJ’s professional life or his personal life. I choose the former.

The average person can not begin to fathom the peaks and valleys of fame or superstardom that was/is Michael Jackson. Only those closest to him know the truth of his trials and personal battles. Now it is between him and GOD.

This brings me to a few other thoughts inspired by my pastor today. Over the last week or so we have seen in the media a school official from Duke University involved in a sting whereby he was arranging for a man to have relations with his 5 year old son, a state official using tax payer money to spend time with his mistress in Argentina on Father’s Day, the reality tv show Jon & Kate Plus 8 experienced their highest ratings even when the couple announced they where getting a divorce. Entertainment is the centerpiece of our lives, political corruption is the norm, and we enjoy human suffering.

The state of affairs we currently live in reminds me of another society of the past; Rome. In Rome, entertainment was the center piece with the building of great colliseums. Political corruption was rampant and human tragedy was on display with gladiators. Subsequently, the Roman empire fell, great as it was. As my pastor put it, I don’t know how close we are to the edge but I know we’re heading in the wrong direction.

I’ve heard it put this way, “History doesn’t repeat itself but it rhymes.”

I simply want to express the power and importance of genuine character. It is my opinion that we need a massive infusion and morals and values. The moral compass is either broken or we are not using it. Either way, we need it!

Your feedback is welcome.

Posted by Character Coach in 01:54:17 | Permalink | No Comments »

Saturday, June 6, 2009

Long time, no blog

It has been a few months since my last blog. It has been a little crazy but now the character coach is back in full swing and I’m am executing a marketing plan to launch my new book”Character Coins; Investing in Significance.” I am so excited about this project which is due out early fall. In the mean time i can be found on Twitter at http://twitter.com/1charactercoach . I’ll be sure to keep everyone updated. Until next time…..

Robert Reed
www.mycharactercoach.com
“Success from the inside out!”

Posted by Character Coach in 20:33:50 | Permalink | Comments (1) »

Friday, September 5, 2008

A View From the Pit

Recently I experienced a few trials in a relative short period of time. In the span of about a month I experienced financial setbacks, a work related conflict, and trouble with “ex’s” and in the middle of it all I began to monitor my emotions. I began to turn inward and feel angry and down on myself. I felt myself spiraling emotionally wondering “why is all of this happening to me?”.  Then it hit me.

Moments like the ones I was experiencing was the “testing” of my character. Many times we like the “-mony” part of “testimony” but not the “test”. It is in the test where character is formed. It is in those moments when we should start to speak into the situation in faith. When we embrace the Word it in turn embraces us so when the pressure rises the Word will come out of us. That is the essence of character.

I was too focused on my pits instead of the promise. Your pits are opportunities to learn, grow, mature and strengthen your beliefs. Sometimes it takes sandpaper to smooth away the rough edges. So the next time you find yourself in the pit refocus on the promise, grow in faith, cultivate your character and use God’s promises to overcome the pits.

Feedback Welcome! 

Posted by Character Coach in 15:15:22 | Permalink | Comments (2)

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

How to say Thank You to God

It has been way too long since my last post. So much has been going on so far and so much is yet to be done. That’s life.

 A few things have been running through my mind about character and the purpose for building character. First, character is giving God your best. Look at it this way, God has saved you from your sin debt through Christ so developing a Christlike character is your way of saying “thank you.” Besides , ask yourself what should you be doing with Christ’s sacrifice? After you accepted Christ you gained salvation but you’re still here!

Since your here you might as well equipped yourself with a powerful, magnetic, inspiring character to serve others.

Second, God would not prescribe certain trials, experiences, joys, tragedies, triumphs, opportunities and victories if they were not for use. And since they are for use they are for keeps (at least the lessons they contain) embedded into your character.

Finally, character is your compass. Once you are conscience about the development of your character your character will guide your decisions. Good decisions leads to a good life, a good life leads to a great destiny. Lets face it, our decisions have colored our life so far and will continue to do so. You now have the opportunity to be conscience about your choices going forward!

Until next time say thank you to God by getting into your purpose and living up to your potential!

Feedback Welcome!

Posted by Character Coach in 16:56:10 | Permalink | Comments (2)

Monday, January 7, 2008

New Year, New You!

It’s a new year and a time for new beginnings. It’s also the time when we begin our resolutions.

We promise ourselves to lose weight/ get in shape, make more money or stop smoking. The odd thing about these top 3 resolutions is that they are always the top 3. We make the same resolutions every year! The problem is if we are making the same promises to ourselves every year, we are not growing or progressing.

Not this year!

This year will be different. Instead of making a resolution and letting it fall by the wayside 2 months out you will instead make a declaration and a mission statement.

You will declare: I am a non smoker!
I am losing weight now!
I am debt free!
I am an investor!
I am energetic!

You will back your declarations up with a personal mission statement. Your mission statement will contain your declarations and will be use to guide your actions the rest of the year but more importantly, your personal mission statement will express your purpose, it reminds you of the “what” and “why” your doing your declarations .

Visit www.nightingale.com for help with designing your personal mission statement.

Another important step is to set up a goals sheet with deadlines. Make sure you break your goals up into quarters. In other words, you will complete your goals or a portion of your goals in a certain quarter of the year. Sometimes we get lazy in our thinking, in January, and believe we have all year to complete a goal and the next thing we know we are eating Thanksgiving dinner! So don’t let time get by you this year. Break down each goal and set it to a timetable. Then type it up and review it EVERYDAY to reinforce it.

Stick to it and next year you will be making different declarations because you’ve accomplished this years declarations!   

Posted by Character Coach in 16:24:33 | Permalink | Comments (1) »

Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Forgiveness: A freeing character trait

If you have lived any length of time, you have been hurt. Physically, emotionally, mentally, financially or socially. At some point in our lives we have been hurt in some way. We will never forget the pain we felt when someone hurt us. It stays with us seemingly forever.

I remember a bitter breakup I experienced not too long ago. I was crushed and devestated to say the least and the pain from the breakup was emotionally unbearable. I had so much anger and bitterness inside screaming “how could she do this to me?!”. The point here is sometimes we get so wrapped up in our pain and what someone has done to us that we develop a small almost myopic view of our present pain. The focus turns inward.

We’re mad at those who hurt us yet we have hurt others. We ask God for forgiveness yet we don’t forgive others.

The bottom line is this. We forget that WE too hurt others, sometimes deliberately other times by accident, but we all hurt each other and that’s where forgiveness comes in. Sure I was hurt and done wrong but over time I’m sure I hurt others in different ways and sometimes I may not have been aware of it.

Look in the mirror and realize that we as people hurt each other in different ways and it probably won’t soon change so instead of developing a “victim” mentality, understand and realize love covers a multitude of sins and forgiveness frees us from the past pains.

Feedback Welcome!

Posted by Character Coach in 21:01:06 | Permalink | Comments (1) »

Wednesday, September 12, 2007

Your Character reflects what you Believe

Do you think God wants you to be wealthy?
I pose this question because so many people possess a “just get by” or “survival” mentality. But if we serve an abundant God wouldn’t it make sense that our Heavenly Father wants his children to prosper ? (in the right way)
Proverbs 10:22 
 The blessing of the LORD brings wealth, and he adds no trouble to it.
Passage Jeremiah 29:11:
11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
Deuteronomy 8:18
 But remember the LORD your God, for it is he who gives you the ability to produce wealth, and so confirms his covenant, which he swore to your forefathers, as it is today.
2 Chronicles 1:11
God said to Solomon, “Since this is your heart’s desire and you have not asked for wealth, riches or honor, nor for the death of your enemies, and since you have not asked for a long life but for wisdom and knowledge to govern my people over whom I have made you king, therefore wisdom and knowledge will be given you. And I will also give you wealth, riches and honor, such as no king who was before you ever had and none after you will have.”
Proverbs 8:18
With me are riches and honor, enduring wealth and prosperity
And of course seek first the kingdon of God and his righteousness and all these things will be added unto you.
Just a thought. Feed back Welcome!
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Thursday, July 26, 2007

Character: Adjusting your internal thermostat

I find myself in many conversations with different people on topics of relationships, finances and spirituality. As I reflected on the different topics I’ve found they had something in common and that is the persons internal comfort level, thought process and emotional state about the topic, in short their thermostat.

We’ve all heard by now that 9 out of 10 lottery winners are broke in less than 2 years no matter how much they’d won. Their financial thermostat is set to “poverty” or “struggle” but no matter what the setting is they will subconsciously divest themselves of their wealth. Like a thermostat they will get themselves back to where the needle is set. Its not the money it’s the person.

The same rules apply in relationships. If you are used to people treating you badly most of your life, when you meet someone who treats you well, you will sabotage the relationship if your thermostat is set to abuse or adopt a victim mentality. You expect mistreatment and then act accordingly. 

We have to adjust our thermostat by changing our internal dialogue. Will you continue thinking; “Money is hard to come by.” or ” All men are jerks” or any other negative psycho babble that we play in our heads that sets the gauge on our internal thermostat? 

Feedback welcome. Click the comment tab 

Posted by Character Coach in 18:31:02 | Permalink | Comments (2)

Monday, July 16, 2007

The Character of Success

Success or failure is character. Not any one event or situation will make you a success or failure but your repeated actions. In other words your habits. You see, a successful or soon to be successful person, first picks up success habits. They may make a habit of reducing their debt, living below their means, and investing in assets such as real estate, stocks or starting a business. It will begin as something they do but over time, those winning habits become who they are. Donald Trump no longer has to convince himself to build or buy assets, it is no longer what he does, it is who he is!

The same is true for any person of long term success in any aspect of life. First develop good beneficial habits then it will develop into “who you are” not just “what you do.” After that success becomes automatic! As the saying goes; Sow a habit,reap a character; sow a character, reap a destiny!

Your feedback is welcome! click on comments.

Posted by Character Coach in 23:06:01 | Permalink | Comments (1) »

Friday, June 22, 2007

The Matter of Marriage

Funny thing about marriage. Often times we get caught up in the euphoria or in lust and make long term decisions from that feeling. Most of us are painfully aware of the results. The rose colored glasses crack over time. What used to be precious is now a pet peeve. “She’s so organized” turns into “She’s a neat freak” or “He’s so laid back and easy going” turns into ” He’s lazy”.

Choosing a mate has just as much to do with our character as it does the other person. I have a friend who said to me ” I gave my all, everything that I am, to him and he still treated my horribly.” Problem is, it doesn’t matter what we do if you’re giving your all to the wrong person. There’s a saying in business that goes;”You don’t want to get to the top of the corporate ladder only to find out it was leaning against the wrong wall.” And so it is in relationships, careful who you invest yourself into. Give yourself time to find out more about a person after the intitial attraction has dimmed a little. The sizzle is nice but how’s the steak?

Too many families have suffered because we didn’t dig a little deeper. Love is in fact a choice. Once you have all the factors you can make a better choice. I too fell at the hands of “the grass is greener” syndrome.

I wrote a marriage covenant to illustrate the choice:

  • Marriage is created for God’s purpose

  • Marriage is for character development.

  • Marriage is a microcosm of God’s love, commitment, grace, mercy and compassion.

  • A great marriage focuses on God’s purpose not just individual needs.

  • Marriage is doing what is Right because it is Right not because it Feels right

 

The Covenant Attitude: “I will never leave you or forsake you.”

I will not worship or be ruled by my feelings

I will operate from God’s will and not emotions

When I say I love you, it is not because I feel good about you because that could change.

I’m not saying I’m attracted to you because that could change.

I’m not saying I feel like we are friends because that could change

 

What I’m saying to you is; I am coveted to you. I will never leave you or forsake you

(Joshua 1:5)

Emotions are fickle, but the quality of our life/marriage will depend on the commitments we make. If you are divorced or in a struggling marriage make new and improved decisions and quality commitments. It has everything to do with character.  

 

Posted by Character Coach in 15:12:17 | Permalink | Comments (3)